The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
