Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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