I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
