I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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