Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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