btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
He felt like a one man threesome
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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