Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
