TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
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