I'll bet she douches with gravy.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
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