it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
50% drunk capacity currently
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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