you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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