Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I could make wine with my vomit
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
