You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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