my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
