I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I'm passing your future prison.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
