my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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