just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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