What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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