No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize