Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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