I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
