I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
