I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
