Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
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