so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
