They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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