You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
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