Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
