I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
