Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
