No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Found the puke drawer
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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