Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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