I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
