Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
