It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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