Your mouth is God's brothel.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize