Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
If I die, sorry about rent.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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