Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
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