i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Randomize
