i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
