arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
