their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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