saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
We left the knife in your bed.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
The cops high fived after they tackled you
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