Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
