We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
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