You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
