The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
