Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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