also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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