a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Randomize