I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
